A Rachel Story

4 kids...that's all I wanted. That was my limit. We had 4 kids in less than 7 years and none of them were multiples. We had been buying diapers for over 7 years straight and I was so ready to be done with that. We had been through 4 difficult pregnancies and I was more than ready to close that chapter of my life. There were no "empty chairs" at our dinner table in my opinion and I felt totally at peace with the decision to be done bearing children. Well, sort of. When people would ask me how I knew I was done and if I had prayed about that decision, I realized that I was deliberately NOT praying about it. Perhaps I knew what His answer would be and I just didn't want to hear it. Anyway I was fine with not praying about it. After all, I knew my own physical and emotional limits better than any one else, right? HAH! One fateful Monday morning in early January 2007 I was vacuuming and I mused that I hadn't had a period in December. Strange, I thought, since my body is like clockwork that way. That little "could I be pregnant?" voice whispered to me and I shoved it aside and continued vacuuming and tried to think bout something/anything else, but that nagging voice kept getting louder and louder until even the vacuuming couldn't drown it out! Ridiculous, not to mention impossible I thought as I turned off the vacuum, but even so I decided to make an emergency run to Walgreens for the pregnancy test just to rule it out. My body is like clockwork, I tell you! I dragged my two little ones with me and blushed at the cash register clerk like I always do when I buy those things! I took it immediately - I didn't have the patience to wait for "morning urine" (does anyone?) It was positive, of course...extremely positive and I sat there aghast trying to think of how on earth this could have happened. We were so careful...how could it be?...what will I do?...how will this work?...I'm not ready...I didn't choose this!!! My own selfish and bitter thoughts drove me to tears as I realize how terrible I sounded. The Lord had just handed me a huge blessing, one I didn't even ask for and I was completely ungrateful at that moment. Shame on me. The tears flowed even harder and I made the phone call to Cade. He was as shocked as I was but calmly reassured me that everything would be okay and things would work out for us. Cade's so good that way, always the voice of reason when I'm in a panic. In my state of panic I kept thinking of how I needed my mom. We had been living in Arizona for 8 years without my mom and had no major plans to move to Utah, but for some reason I kept thinking about how much I needed my mom! As the days went by and the morning sickness/severe depression hit, the feeling that we needed to move to Utah would not subside so I decided to express to Cade these bizarre thoughts, thinking he would roll his eyes and try to change the subject. Instead, he told me that he had been feeling that exact same way and thought he should ask his boss (who just happens to be his brother, Mike) if there were any positions open in Salt Lake. Astonishingly, there was. They were creating the position of Corporate Parts Manager, and thought Cade would be a great fit. He enthusiastically accepted the job offer and our house was up on the market a few weeks later. Our enthusiasm began to wane as we realized the housing market was not nearly as "hot" as it had been in months prior, and began dropping the price little by little in hopes of attracting the perfect buyer. The perfect buyer was nowhere to be found and I was getting more pregnant by the day. We were in a quandary. Do we wait for the house to sell, keep the kids in their school and have the baby here in Arizona while Cade commutes back and forth to Utah? Or do we leave our house vacant and and try and get somewhat settled in Utah before the baby comes? We decided on the latter, packed up our stuff and tearfully said goodbye to our amazing friends and family and headed up north. Because we were trying to sell a house in a really crummy market we played it safe and moved in with Cade's parents...and waited. Waited for our dumb house to sell, waited for a baby that I felt no connection to at all. It sucked. Limbo is a bad bad place. It makes you doubt yourself, it makes you doubt others, it makes you bitter, it's completely frustrating!!! Despite Cade's parents' care and hospitality(they were great), I was dying to be settled in a place of our own. I was a fish out of water and I didn't know how long I could flounder before I hit my breaking point. I felt like I had no control over anything in my life, and I know I resented the little nuisance in my huge belly for turning our lives upside down and landing us in Limbo. And then one day, August 27th to be exact, something happened. Something miraculous and beautiful and perfectly wonderful happened. Rachel Elizabeth was born...

She was happy and healthy and from the moment I laid eyes on her, my heart melted. I cried and cried and cried there on the delivery table (just ask my husband and my sister and my mom) as I released 9 months worth of fear, anxiety, stress, pain and resentment. It was replaced with love, pure love, God's love, and I was healed. At that moment I knew that God loved me, that He had a plan for me, and that plan included not 4, but 5 beautiful children. Rachel is indeed a gift, hand-picked for all of us to love and enjoy...and we do! Her little light shines so bright and we all get to benefit from it every day. What a blessing! How grateful I am for a loving Heavenly Father who knows me better that I know myself and knows what I want even better that I know what I want. Thank goodness.

Happy 1st Birthday Rachel Baby!

Oh Where, Oh Where Has Our Summer Gone?

We've done a little school shopping.

(of course, the one NOT going to school this year got the most "school" clothes...sorry boys.)I did the Breaking Dawn Release Party at Barnes & Noble...

...with a couple of friends/Edward groupies.

I managed to find time to neglect my poor children for a few days to get in a good summer read...and it was so worth it.

I finally let the kids have their much-anticipated snow-cone/cookie stand. They each earned some spending money for our upcoming trip to Canada. Cade had each of them take out tithing on what they earned and fill out a tithing slip. On Sunday they all happily gave their envelopes to the Bishop...except Hannah! As the chapel began to quiet down for sacrament meeting, she very loudly declared "But Mommy, if I give the Bishop my money then I won't have any left for candy at the gas station!!!" It's all about the candy at our house...seriously.

My sister Suz and I continue on our business adventure a.k.a The Pretty Petal. We've done 3 home parties this month as well as Summerfest in Bountiful City. We're having so much fun and dream of actually being profitable...someday!!

Other things we did that I didn't take pictures of:

• Family Night at the Bees game
• Swimming & more swimming
  
• Family barbecues
• Lots of Arizona peeps visiting
  
• More dentist visits than I care to count
• The boys' soccer camp - they're so dang cute
  
• Watching the Olympics (and loving every minute of it!)
  

There, I did it...I'm all caught up on the blog (I promise you that a highly funny/interesting post is on the horizon...really) Well, we're off to Canada now - I'll try not to forget the camera!

The Seeley's Visit

Dane and Lorena graced us with an 11-Day trip to sunny Utah from even sunnier Arizona! It was their va-cation and our stay-cation (since we spent as much money...minus the small fortune in gas... as they did having fun and eating out!) Some of the highlights of the trip included:

THE DINOSAUR PARK!

LAGOON!(by the way, Hannah & Brookie's cars stayed in that exact spot
for the entire duration of the "ride"!)Hannah kept going on this ultra-lame ride until she could get the all-important elephant-with-the-PINK-collar. Girls.

After roasting in line for 30 minutes...we finally cooled off on Rattlesnake Rapids!

The RIO GRANDE CAFE (mmm...Mexican.)

...and the GATEWAY!

THIS IS THE PLACE HERITAGE PARK

(The kids were very concerned about the goat biting off Rachel's toes -
don't worry, they're still attached!)

I got to visit my great-great-grandfather John Fairbanks' ancestral home!


The kids' got pony rides...

and ice cream, so there was a little something for everyone!

We enjoyed good quality SISTER-IN-LAW TIME...
...GIRL-COUSIN-IN-MATCHING-JAMMIES TIME...

...and MALE-BONDING TIME!

What more could you ask for?
Thanks Dane, Lorena, Andrew, Cassandra, Elena and Brooke for the great times! We miss you already...come again soon!

A Travel "How-To"

How to Survive a Week-Long Vacation to Spokane with 5 Kids under Age 10 and No Husband within a 700 Mile Radius

1. Take along your wonderful, amazing sister-in-law Dorrie and niece Bekah who will help out a ton with the driving AND the kids (they even brought along numbered goodie bags to be opened at marked intervals during the 10-hour journey).
2. Make sure you are driving a car with a DVD player, and make sure the volume is up very high so you can't hear any whining or tattle-telling. Sunglasses and tiaras are optional.
3. Make sure there are plenty of first-cousins-once-removed close to the same ages as your kids so they can be thoroughly entertained by each other throughout the entire trip (except on the few occasions when they fight as first-cousins-once-removed sometimes do).
4. Try and match your kids' outfits in public places so they are easier to spot (...plus it's just so dang cute!)
5. Try and throw in a birthday for your middle child so that you have the perfect excuse to not have a "friends" party when you get home...and don't call it a "first-cousins-once-removed" party - that sounds kinda lame.
6. Give yourself a pat on the pack for fitting in any amount of one-on-one time with any of your 5 children under the age of 10.
7. Don't be afraid to ask total strangers to take group photographs so that everyone can be in the picture.8. On the hot days, keep the complaining down to a minimum by including lots of WATER in your activities. Olympic-sized swimming pools are definitely helpful...

...as are gigantic splash fountains!

8. Try and be more understanding when your three-year-old prefers this carousel (NOT free):

to this one (free):

and bring extra quarters to humor the little squirt!

9. Surround yourself with the beauty of nature, meditate, and maybe you'll actually be able to hear yourself think!

10. Count heads...a LOT. 1...2...3...4...5...yep, they're all there!11. Enjoy the companionship and long conversations with wonderful women that you count as some of your dearest friends!
12. Pawn your baby off on any of those fine women, because you don't have a husband around to do that to!
13. Only go to a restaurant with 9 children if you're ordering dessert...they'll be too busy shoveling ice cream in their mouths to misbehave and you'll get out of there a lot quicker. Mmmm...ice cream!

Thanks for the great time, Jessica, Ryan & Co. Come see us anytime!

Top 10 Things to Blog About Over the Past 2 Weeks
(In no Particular Order)

10. Hannah gave herself a haircut.Everyone else's kids give themselves haircuts at one time or another but I thought my kids and I had an understanding...apparently not. I was tidying up in the bathroom last weekend when I discovered a drawer-ful of hair and a pair of Skissors lying menacingly on the counter. I screamed because a giant wad of hair was the last thing I expected to see next to the toothpaste. I knew from the length and color of the hair that it was Hannah's and that she had to have done a bang-up job. I ran into her room where she was pretending to be asleep and, sure enough! She had given herself a rather modern, asymmetrical cut and some short bangs that we have been growing out for over a year. Luckily, we were able to get a pretty cute A-line bob out of it, courtesy of Supercuts. Because of Hannah's distaste for admission of any wrongdoing, she will proudly announce to everyone that she likes her hair much better now. Stinker.

9. My Children's Place order arrived and my boys cried because I made them wear their new sweater vests to church.To add insult to injury I threatened to take away video games for a whole week if they didn't smile for the camera...don't they look genuine? I do so love a smart sweater vest, even if it is 95 degrees outside and my children want to kill me.

8. We had our first and hopefully last bunny fatalityOn that fateful day, Hannah came running into the house exclaiming happily "Mom, Oreo is okay, mom...she's Oooo-Kaaaay!" which, of course, alerted me to the fact that Oreo was probably NOT okay. Tyler read my mind and ran out to the bunny cage where he discovered Oreo's lifeless body. He brought her into the house, sobbing uncontrollably and much drama ensued...tears, accusations, more tears. We are still unclear about Oreo's cause of death and getting the solid truth out of a three year-old is next to impossible as her story changes with each retelling. Adam asked me later on that day if Hannah could still go to heaven for hurting Oreo. I took that golden opportunity to teach my children a little gospel lesson about love and forgiveness...and accidents. We will miss you, Oreo!

7. We discovered Rachel is definitely a water baby.Okay, so this is really a shameless attempt to show off how adorable my baby is in her stars & stripes swimsuit. She does love the water!

6. The boys discovered that sleeping on the trampoline is fun!...However, I'm still a little freaked out and often find myself sleeping on the couch with the windows open, listening for abductors...not so fun.

5. My sister Suzanne and I became "carnies".We debuted our Pretty Petal merchandise at the Centerville 4th of July carnival. We did very well and had a blast! Our website is now up and running, too! (www.theprettypetal.com)

4. We still managed to enjoy some family time together watching fireworks and chillin' out.Cheese! (Apparently Adam has the "Say Cheese Disease"...poor kid!)

3. Cade showed off his mad snow-cone making skills to the delight of all who partook.You have a gift Cade, don't ever forget it!

2. Hannah and her cousin, Carly were inexplicably overcome with affection towards one another.

I snapped the picture upon realizing that they were ACTUALLY hugging and not hurting...maybe there is hope for those two after all!

1. I headed up to Spokane, Washington with the kids to visit Cade's niece, Jessica, and her family. We had so much fun! Details and photo documentation are forthcoming...just as soon as I finish unpacking!